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Unfortunately the majority of people on our lavish little green planet are not happy with their ‘lot’ in life. They are living lives of quiet desperation, unsatisfied with their relationships, careers or finances.

What is the main reason for this dissatisfaction? The main reason I believe this is so is due to a lack of understanding about the nature of our universe which can be directly linked to our belief conditioning from childhood.

As a child we begin to replicate the conditioning of our parents. A person’s beliefs and values are often passed from generation to generation until someone down the generations either has a life-changing experience or consciously reorganises or changes their belief system.

Your beliefs and values determine your focus and a key point I make in all my writings on personal development is the simple truth that “your focus determines your reality”. Focus sets in motion the Law of Attraction. (See Wealth Beyond Reason for instructions on using the law of attraction.)

The internal dialogue and imaginings of your mind are guided by your focus and your focus is reflected in your thinking. Your thinking becomes automatic and therefore this becomes your automatic creation system.

If you are not currently living a life that is in correspondence with your desires it is due to your internal automatic creation system being out of alignment with your goals. Simply put this means: Your focus is on what you do not want instead of what you want!

Let’s say you have bills piling up everywhere and no way of paying them. When you receive post through the mail what is your first thought? I bet it goes something like this, “oh no not more bills”. Where is your focus directed?

Why do the rich get richer and the poor get poorer? Well a rich man has money and he knows it. He sees wealth all around him. The poor person sees lack and concentrates on it. Can you see the difference in focus?

Now there are there are two basic ways to redirect your focus. The first is to change your beliefs so that your focus becomes more automatic in the direction that you wish it to go. The second way is to consciously redirect your attention to situations, people or events that correspond to a new belief.

This, however, is often easier said than done. For example examine the beliefs of a racist who thinks that he is superior to another person due to his heritage, skin colour, or ethnic origins. Now any right thinking person knows that these beliefs have no foundation in reality (subjective or otherwise). So in order to change these beliefs, at a core level, the racist would need to have some contact with other racial groups that have equal or better results in areas of their lives than he does. If he believes he is more intelligent then he would need to see that there are highly intelligent people of all races. If he believes that he is more prone to being successful because of his genetics then he would need to see that there are people of all races who achieve success with ease. If he believes that he is more equipped to overcome obstacles than members of another race then he would need to know that people from all walks of life and different cultures have achieved against seemingly insurmountable odds at great hardship to themselves and so on!

The problem with this is FOCUS! In most cases the racist does not want to see these things. He focuses on the situations, people and events that correspond and reinforce his beliefs! In extreme circumstances such a person will not even be in the company, correspond with, or listen about members of the group he is racist against.

You and I do exactly the same thing everyday. If your life is similar today to yesterday, last week or last year it is primarily because your focus has remained the same. Your thoughts yesterday where the same as last week and if your thoughts and focus are the same today then you can expect tomorrow to bring the same results!

If your beliefs are challenged by what you see, hear or experience many times you simply disregard the information and continue ‘blindly’ believing what you chose to believe. We filter our reality so that is reinforces our beliefs. We need to break free from this self-imposed brain-washing and redirect our focus on the things that will reinforce a new belief until we actually come to belief it.

For example take a couple in a ‘bad’ relationship. They come home from work and just know that they are going to have an argument with their spouse. Sure enough they arrive home and argue about who is taking the dog for a walk, what to watch on TV or why they argue so much! Where is the focus in this relationship?

Let’s say they decide to try an experiment in beliefs and focus. They look at what IS working in the relationship. They recall the reasons why they first became a couple and begin to reinforce the things they have in common. Their focus is beginning to shift. Although they will probably fall back into some old routines of arguing again if they keep their focus on their shared interests and the things in their relationship that are working what do you think the effect will be?

Try this little experiment yourself. Choose a person who annoys you in some way and that you can’t avoid but would if the choice where yours. A work colleague is a good example. Can you think of one? OK, what are you focusing on about that person? I bet it is all the things they do that annoy you. Try to think of something they do that you admire of that you like. This can be sometimes difficult but remember that every person has good and bad qualities so try not to become too polarised about people thinking them either good or bad – they are just human beings.

Now for a few days try your best to focus on the things you like or admire about them and watch what happens.

After you have tried this little experiment try other small ones in other areas of your life that you wish to improve.

About The Author

Michael McGrath operates several successful websites including the product review sites http://hypnosis.personal-development.info & http://www.personal-development.info/subliminals.html . His sites test & review the best in their industry.

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Unlimited financial abundance is your birthright!!

Sounds great doesn’t it, but do you really believe it? It’s not surprising if you don’t.

Many of us don’t believe we have access to unlimited financial abundance because we were raised in a culture that places severe limitations on our creative abilities to attract money. These limitations begin during early childhood when our basic beliefs about everything are being formed.

Think back to when you were a child. What did you consistently hear and experience regarding money?

Did you hear that “money doesn’t grow on trees” or “money is the root of all evil”?

Did people in your household fight about not having enough money?

Did your dad grow surly and silent when it was time to pay the bills?

Was your mom afraid to ask your dad for more money if an unexpected financial emergency came up?

Were vacations eagerly anticipated or were they actually stressful because the family was going on vacation even if they “couldn’t afford it”?

Whatever the situation, you consciously and unconsciously absorbed those beliefs about money and wealth. This became your belief system or paradigm.

Many of us are completely unaware of the unconscious belief systems that are governing our attitudes, behaviors, expectations and comfort level regarding how much money we think we deserve and actually attract.

Do this little exercise with me.

Imagine for a moment that a complete stranger walks up to you on the street and hands you a cashier’s check for one million dollars. This stranger tells you that the money is a special gift and is unconditionally yours-no strings attached.

How would you instantly react?

1. Would you nervously look around for the hidden cameras?

2. Would you absolutely refuse the gift and even feel some resentment towards the stranger for putting you in such a predicament?

3. Would you accept the gift but then feel guilty and make immediate plans on how you were going to give the money away?

4. Would you graciously accept the money with heart-felt thanks and happily go to your bank cash the check and enjoy the money?

Your initial “gut reaction” to the above scenario allows some of your unconscious core beliefs about money bubble up to the surface.

If you picked one of the first 3 answers you definitely have some inherent beliefs that are severely limiting your birthright of prosperity. But the good new is-they are only beliefs. Keep in mind that beliefs are not truth. They are just a perception and an acceptance of the truth. What’s great about beliefs is that you can change them and choose ones that support you and are in alignment with unlimited wealth potential

If you picked number four, congratulations!!! You’re well on your way to unlimited financial abundance!!!

About The Author

Becky Kimes is a professional coach, speaker and author who specializes in helping women break through the invisible barriers keeping them from manifesting their dreams.

She works with individuals, and conducts live workshops and tele-seminars. More information can be found at http://www.goingforsuccess.com

Guest columns should fit with the theme of this site: discovering what it means to get out of the day to day EXISTENCE and start enjoying life by LIVING.

Please use the contact page if you would like to contact me about this.

To LIFE !

Photo by Kazze

There are many things we can do to relieve stress, ranging from small routine changes (such as avoiding rush hour traffic) to large drastic life changes (such as quitting our stressful jobs!).

At the smaller end of the scale, I believe one of the best ways that you can relieve stress is to ‘get creative’.

What can you do to get creative? Anything you like, as long as ‘you’ do the creating!

It could be physical or mental creativity (preferably both), big or small. For example, is it about time you changed your garden around? Changed those dull old patio slabs? Now would be a good idea to get creative.

To relieve stress you have to do something you can be proud of. You need to be able to stand back and say to yourself, `Yep, I did that and I did a terrific job’.

Take the example above, if you’re not physically able (and would have to employ someone to do the labouring for you) you could still design the garden yourself! Teach yourself a little about landscape gardening and design the best garden you can. If you are able to labour for yourself, design and build it entirely yourself! And most important of all, give yourself a pat on the back once you’ve finished and be proud of your hard work.

But it doesn’t have to be so big (or so expensive). You could make a model aeroplane, do your own painting, and make something from clay, or anything at all.

One of my friends recently bought his own materials and built a magnificent kite! He said it felt great to finish it, but when he stood back and actually saw his achievement (i.e. when it was flying) he felt truly elated. Now that’s stress relief!

Form a personal point of view, having suffered with a phobia of public speaking for so long, I always wanted to set up my own website – to be able to communicate in another way, freely, without the troubles I would usually have. When I eventually found a way to set up my site the pride and sense of achievement I felt was enormous. And with that pride and achievement came the stress relief I was after.

So from the examples above I hope you can see how you too can get creative to relive stress. The list of things you could do is endless.

Now it’s time for the hard part. . . getting started!

About The Author

(c) Paul Evans

Helping those who suffer with anxiety, phobias, panic disorders, stress, and all things related.

Suffer with an anxiety disorder or phobia, and the stress that comes with it? For more information and directions to the latest self-help techniques, be sure to visit my website at http://www.love-my-phobia.com

Push yourself to excel. Go beyond your idea of what is possible. If you lift weights, push yourself on from the 10th repetition to 11, then to 12, and then 13, and so on.

It is in those additional repetitions that the advancement and growth occur.

Do the things you didn’t think were possible for you to do.

As you are pushing yourself, remember that you are growing, developing, and expanding.

You gain confidence by looking back on your accomplishments and realizing you have the ability to achieve more.

When Edmund Hillary made his first attempt to climb to the peak of Mt. Everest, he was unable to reach the summit.

When he returned to base camp from his failed attempt, it is said that he looked up at the mountain and said, “You defeated me! But you won’t defeat me again! Because you have grown all you can grow … but I am still growing!”

You will never stop growing!

When you do something, you gain confidence that you can do it again. When you go beyond what you believe you can do, you gain confidence that you can overcome any perceived limits. When you surpass your supposed limitations in a few areas of your life, you start realizing you can overcome self-imposed restrictions in all different areas of your life. That allows your self-confidence to grow and to build momentum, which helps you to grow and develop even more.

This is not about special people who are different; it’s about you!

Surround yourself with reminders of your past success!

The other thing you need to do is to have friends who see your potential and your abilities. They can see the person you can become and will be able to help you push yourself onward.

I belong to a Mastermind Group that gets together every month to explain what it is we each desire. Every member of the group then desires that the other members will achieve what they are setting out to do.

It is a phenomenal process. Because you have other people who desire for you to achieve your goals and believe that what you want is actually possible, it is easier to keep striving and pushing yourself to succeed.

Confident people are confident because they push themselves!

Mark Victor Hansen, best known as the co-creator of the ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ empire (which is listed in the Guinness Book of World Records as the best-selling non-fiction book series ever), Mark is a walking success magnet! Between his books and speeches, Mark has helped countless millions of people become their very best. Visit Mark’s 101 E-Book Library at http://www.IdeasThatCanChangeYourLife.com.

In order for us to become a progressively better person, it is necessary to learn to become truly responsible for our thoughts, actions and consequences related to those activities. Being responsible goes had and hand with having self-discipline, and having self-discipline is akin to being responsible. Self-discipline to me is the ability to get yourself to take the proper action whether you feel like it or not.

Being responsible means doing the right thing all the time. That is not to say that we sometimes slip up and make mistakes, but at least we should strive to do what is right. In order to get ahead in life and achieve our goals and dreams we must have self discipline. Each and every one of us is vastly more capable than we will ever realize, and more often than not, it has a lot to do with the desire for instant gratification.

We are born into this world with a need for our instant gratification to be met or we may perish, but as we grow older, many of us never out grow this need. At some point we all have to grow up and come to the realization that life is full of disappointments and frustrations, and dealing with them and working thru them is all a part of personal growth. We are so easily seduced by immediate satisfaction. As an adult we must face reality and learn that avoiding a difficult situation today only makes matters worse. You’ve got to understand that you must exchange some pain now for much less pain (or even pleasure) later. Gaining pleasure the quickest way possible may be pleasant now but in the long run, you are in for trouble. If you put pleasure before responsibilities, then you are not demonstrating self-discipline.

There are a number of obstacles to self discipline. One of the main ones is parental spoiling. One of the worst things you can do to a child is to spoil them in a manner that they get everything they want. This is really doing the youngster a disservice. After being catered to all of their lives these kids grow up with serious issues related to self-discipline. Unless they learn to suffer the consequences of their actions, they are unlikely to ever develop responsibilities.

Procrastination can also obstruct self-discipline. It is a silent killer; it is like a disease not unlike alcoholism or drug addiction… cunning and crippling. My mother used to say “Do something if you do it wrong.” She was right. Perfectionism is a nice virtue but it, like procrastination can be crippling. The paralysis of analysis can often get in the way of progress. Action is the only thing that will move us closer to our goals.

Another really huge hindrance to self-discipline is fear. Fear plays a big role in the inner workings of procrastination and perfectionism. There are many different fears that people face. The Fear of failure, fear of criticism and fear of success are all common. Our own defense mechanisms try to protect us from failure through the use of procrastination. If we never try something, how can we fail? As mentioned earlier, people need to learn how to fail. Fear incapacitates unsuccessful people. In order to overcome fear we must produce momentum by taking bold, decisive action. Try doing something scary. Fear of failure immobilizes you and you must overcome inertia by taking action. We must all remember that failing is a prerequisite for success. It is all but impossible to succeed in anything without first falling flat on your face. It is part of the learning process. Unsuccessful people try one thing that doesn’t work and then give up. Often people give up when they are on the threshold of succeeding. You must be able to conquer yourself, and that is one of the most difficult thing that any of us will ever do.

Barry Taylor is an Executive Chef by profession, a life long student of great cooking and a graduate of the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park, New York. He has also been a student of self help audio programs and books for over 15 years. He also has extensive experience in investigating different money making opportunities in search of ones that actually work. He enjoys sharing some of his thoughts on personal development and marketing ve…<Author’s contact info incomplete>

In The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Mark Twain tells the delightful story of how Tom gets all the other boys in the neighborhood to paint his fence for him.

He has been told that he can’t go fishing until the fence is painted. What a chore!

When the other boys ask if he is going, he basically says, “Why on earth would I want to go fishing? I have a fence to paint. Nothing is more fun than painting a fence.”

He actually gets the other boys to pay him for the right to paint his fence.

Enjoy the process of solving the problem.

Enjoy the process! Whistle while you work. Make it fun. No, make it outrageously fun.

Ask yourself, “What could I do to really enjoy this?”

When we had to write 101 books in 101 days, we asked the same question. It was a huge task, and it felt completely overwhelming. We ended up in a villa in the Maldives, surrounded by our best friends in the world, looking out over crystal blue waters, and singing songs at night.

We enjoyed the process, and you can get the books!

Learn the Lesson In the end, we only get the problems we need. That is a hard nugget to swallow, but so true.

We only get the problems we need!

Each problem that we encounter in life has been given to us as a gift to teach us a lesson, to impart unto us pearls of wisdom, that which in ancient times was called the Pearl of Great Price.

It is something so precious that it cannot be shown to others.

It can only be had by those who have paid the price of having the problem and learning directly from it the lesson it has to teach.

Now if you don’t learn the lesson, you get to keep the problem.

As soon as you learn the lesson, the problem goes away, and you get to wear the Pearl.

Ask yourself, what is the lesson this problem is trying to teach me?

Think about it. Ponder it. Give the lesson the same thought that you give to getting the problem to go away–they are, after all, one and the same thing.

Mark Victor Hansen, best known as the co-creator of the ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ empire (which is listed in the Guinness Book of World Records as the best-selling non-fiction book series ever), Mark is a walking success magnet! Between his books and speeches, Mark has helped countless millions of people become their very best. Visit Mark’s 101 E-Book Library at http://www.IdeasThatCanChangeYourLife.com.